Gay Marriage Arrives.... New Mexico Style

Madam President?

 The more I see the more I like.

“Same Love” Up For MTV Video Music Award

Best Video with a Message
    Beyoncé — “I Was Here”
    Kelly Clarkson — “People Like Us”
    Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (featuring Mary Lambert) — “Same Love”
    Miguel — “Candles in the Sun”
    Snoop Lion (featuring Drake & Cori B.) — “No Guns Allowed

Full story here:queerty.com

We've Come A Long Way Since I was 22

A Great Big World - "Everyone Is Gay"

Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall

Today as millions of us routinely went about our lives, quietly honoring Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and the beginning of the second term of the first African–American President, the earth moved.

“We, the people, declare today that the most evident of truths –- that all of us are created equal –- is the star that guides us still; just as it guided our forebears through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall...”

With those words uttered by President Barack Obama during his Inaugural Address the history of the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender human rights movement was irreversibly changed. We can no longer be denied. A President has put us on the map of civil rights history in a most dramatic and compelling way. As a gay man, it brought chills and tears, it brought validation I didn't even know I needed.

The power of today on our youth will not be known for years, but powerful it was and will be for a long time to come.

“For our journey is not complete until our wives, our mothers and daughters can earn a living equal to their efforts. Our journey is not complete until our gay brothers and sisters are treated like anyone else under the law -- for if we are truly created equal, then surely the love we commit to one another must be equal as well.”

While pundits prattle on about what the speech means as the agenda for the second term, Republicans bemoan “being slighted”, I and many of my LGBTQ family will be celebrating an arrival. An arrival to a closer chair at the table of power, and a step closer to full inclusion in the American dream. At the same time, we know we have much work to do, and that we are up to the task.

When the sun rose this morning we couldn't have expected the historic shift which would occur before it set. We are grateful that tomorrow's dawn will be the first of our new day.

It's A New Year.... A New Me

The Universe Inside Your Mind Blog

Sanity Self-care

During my three week anti-burnout break I did a fair amount of thinking on ways to reduce and manage my stress level. I also contemplated several other areas (anger, support system and sleep)that contributed to my near burnout but I'll address those at another time.

I have been feeling like I work 24/7 because I use a laptop so the office is always with me. Obviously, part of reducing and managing my stress is living work at work. The laptop will only come home when I am traveling. There will be no work done at home with the possible exception of some reading since I find that relaxing. The hours I was working at home will transfer to the center with my new base schedule being 9:00 AM to 5:30 PM Monday to Friday.

A contributing factor to my stress is not "pampering" myself every once in awhile. So going forward I will indulge myself once or twice a week. Indulgences will include Starbucks, the occasional massage, a walk in the park and whatever may come to mind.

Quiet time is critical for my sanity and I have not been getting any for months. I will make time to journal, do guided mediations, read and laugh daily.These few concrete actions should reduce my stress considerably and make me and everyone around me happier.

Thank You Mr. President

Priorities Beyond Marriage

Marriage equality is the top priority for most of the lobbying class within the LGBT community. It is the elephant that sucks the air out of the room and rightly so, it is the single action that has the biggest number of benefits attached. Don’t get me wrong I am a supporter of marriage equality and actively participate in the effort to achieve it. However, there are other issues the LGBT community needs to have addressed.

Our youth are four times more likely to attempt suicide than their straight peers.  In a recent survey over half the youth responding to our Rainbow Youth Pre/Post Assessment (RYPA) reported seriously thinking of suicide within the last week. This is a frightening number. The RYPA is one of the assessment tools we use in our youth program at New Mexico GLBTQ Centers.

Our seniors are often forced back into the closet when moving to retirement communities or long term care facilities. They lack the support structure of children and grandchildren that their straight peers take for granted.  LGBT seniors live with a huge sense of isolation, especially in rural areas.

Another area that needs to be addressed is adequate and affirming healthcare.  In many areas it is nearly impossible to find healthcare and mental healthcare providers who have the cultural competency to give LGBT individuals quality care in an affirming way. Transgender individuals have a particularly difficult challenge.

We as a community and a movement need to place greater emphasis on these issues and ways to address them.  The research data and demographic data on the LGBT community are inadequate.  We need to push the federal government to include sexual orientation with race, income and other factors in all federally sponsored projects and surveys.  We must demand a regulatory environment both state and federal that encourages providers to make affirmative efforts to improve care for LGBT folks.

In an effort to engage and keep engaged youth, especially LGBT youth, all extracurricular activities including art, music, theater, politics and GSAs should be incentivized similar to football and basketball. Our educational system puts too much emphasis on sports and winning while leaving creative pursuits that develop critical thinking skills and more by the wayside.

Where there is an unmet need and advocacy will take time we must create our own service delivery system. People’s quality of life is being affected every day we can’t wait until all the stars align perfectly, all the sub-population (no matter how small) are at the table or for there to be total agreement and no risk to act. We don’t need to reinvent the wheel.  We need to bring together the individuals with the expertise to make things happen, create an action plan and start building something. We can bring other people and resources into the project as we go.

Leadership knows when to stop discussing and start doing.  It’s time to start doing.